Why did I fall for you so hard so deep. ): everything seems so real now. I wish it was real, instead of just acting. I have to constantly remind myself this is not reality. I thought I was over, but the moment you called me baby, everything just came flooding back like that. Those 2 days... It's like I felt genuinely happy after that 1 year. It was like things return back to how it was. I wish it was this way everyday.. Even though I know all those sweet things you said were just jokes, but I thought you would have the decency to actually mean some of it. You postpone the dates again and again... I thought Monday we would finally get to meet. But yet again it WA cancelled. Yes you have valid reasons... But I can't help but feel sooooo disappointed. I am afraid of falling for you harder than I used to. Somewhere within me, I know that you are gonna disappear and leave me hanging there again.. Your gonna have that new girl and I will just be just another girl. Subconsciously, I know that I should stop myself from texting you, from allowing myself to hope and pray that you keep to your words, to even allow you and myself from calling each other darling/baby etc. but yet I can't stop myself. Where's that will power in me, to do those things that are right. I should follow my mind, not my heart. Go on like this I am bound to only fuck myself up even more. I really wonder what is it about you that is so hard to forget. The memories, or is it really just you....